This channel is broken.

I don’t watch the news.

I stopped watching the news regularly when Newtown elementary school was attacked and kindergarteners were killed. I couldn’t stomach that story or the way the media harped on it. I called in sick to work and cried for 3 days.

I stopped watching morning “news” programs after the current person sitting in the White House was elected. Today, the media has gained so many channels but has lost the oversight of Executive Producers whose job is to present balanced coverage.

I have worked in television, have produced videos, and have created marketing and public relation campaigns for 30 years. I love my career because I feel excited when I can help inform and entertain an audience with my words.

When I was first starting out, I wanted to be on the local news. WCVB Channel 5 Boston's Natalie Jacobson and Chet Curtis were that channel’s calm, casual and seemingly concerned anchors. (They were also married and therefore exuded a partnership-like aura.)

I started working as a local cable access reporter in Weymouth, Ma, and covered stories about the schools, community events; even the new recycling initiative for the town (this was 1990). And it was fun, and I loved working with residents to get their word out.

But when I learned what it would be like to work for a bigger broadcast outlet like ABC or the peacock, I soon realized the job wasn’t for me.

Static.

Much like an airline attendant, a female news reporter needed to “stay in shape” and had to buy many of their own clothes to “look good” on camera every day. It also helped if they were blonde.

And then I started to listen to how reporters and anchors spoke. Without a breath, they could move from a scary update about unrest in a foreign country to a fluff piece about a squirrel “stealing” food. The goal of news broadcasts may be stated as informing the people, but they get their budgets from commercials. That’s why they tease you to stay tuned for weather or sports — to keep you watching so their advertisers get more eyes on their products.

I gave up my dream of being a national reporter when I saw that the job was NOT solely based on educating people, as I had previously thought.

Today, we have a person in the White House whose job is understood as leading and protecting the American people. (Note: not their own self-interests.) The thing is, the person in that seat previously had his own career in acting.

Not too long ago, our orange-topped "leader" was on a television show for many seasons, and the catchphrase was dramatic and *dominating*: “You’re fired.” Unfortunately, this power-obsessed character has morphed into a different lead role. And now, his actions and warped views of reality and what’s truly important are directly impacting everyone living on this planet, and not in a positive way.

I still refuse to watch.

I know what happens behind the scenes on TV sets, press events, and PR stunts. We all recognize when someone’s image matters more than their content. We know in our guts when we’re getting a show. Sometimes we go along with it — like if we’re paying to see a rock concert or a Broadway play featuring a big named actress. Even if we don’t like coming off as star-struck, we may still get tongue-tied when we come within feet of a famous person, especially when their Hype enters the space before they do.

So, I refuse to tune into this madness.

We referred to them as "Nat and Chet" during this, the golden age for TV news.

Last night, Channel 5 was covering Tuesday’s #blacklivesmatter protests for hours. The TV was on in my parents’ house, and my mom wanted to see a cooking episode on Chronicle. But that show was preempted so the “news anchors” could follow people walking. Why? To spread the message of this important cause? I believe it was more likely because they were awaiting an eruption like what happened on Sunday night. To catch the violence live and on camera. So they could replay it over and over again afterward.

Ultimately: so they could support their advertisers, catch the dramatic footage, and boast about being “first on the scene.” Because people do watch, and our adrenaline pumps, and our heart rates go up. Because we leave the TV on, click on those viral videos, share those shock-inspiring posts, and feed the machine for more.

You may say that if I tune out, I won’t be informed. But I know what happened to #georgefloyd. No, I didn’t watch the video of him dying. I don’t need to add that unseeable image into my already sensitive, empathetic brain. But I can still support the Cause without watching that footage, getting myself sick, and supporting the Media — whose goal, unfortunately, is not really to help us understand the whole story.

For that, we’re on our own.

And though I’m posting this here, Facebook isn’t gonna provide that either. Let’s face it: this is a platform for venting to our like-minded friends.

I will continue to tune out to preserve my mental health. But I’ll need to find another way to stay informed. I know I can’t keep my head in the sand, and I understand that our society is in a major crisis. 

But this channel is broken.

[Insert: eye-catching video with jolting sound to boost Facebook's rating of this post.]

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