Unthinkable

 "I can't imagine losing a child."

"I sent my daughter to camp this summer. I don't know what I'd do..."

"I don't want to be here eating watermelon and making new friends. I want her back."

One of the mothers of the boys shot at Newtown went to my same college so whenever I see her on social media talking about gun control, I imagine how she feels. 

I felt it when it happened, I called in sick to work. For 3 days. There are some things that happen in the world that I can't not feel -- deeply. 

I'm an empath. Some people call that a snowflake. I tried to imagine talking with a staunch Republican and I thought, I should come up with what I'd say - you know, that would make him realize he's backing the wrong horse?

And I thought, I'd need to stay calm. Rational. Use logic. Facts. Don't yell, listen. Don't get mad.

But then we all know -- or I'm afraid it might be true -- that no one can "convince" anyone of anything in this situation. Even to come out of a trance.

I vowed for my blog, I'd use only photos I took. It's impossible to think of an appropriate image for this post, so I found this of clouds from a play I went to, Kimberly Akimbo.

I've been down about the cruel acts over the last 6-7 months. I'm writing this in July, 2025. And like I said, I can't NOT feel the pain of the parents ripped from their children by detainment, by late-warning disasters, by preventable diseases, scientifically speaking, (not made up.)

I'm frustrated
I'm tired
I'm disheartened
I'm disappointed

I try to see the bright side, the silver lining, the lesson learned. That makes me feel better. Like it's not a waste.

But I feel for those parents hurt by the grubs.

Money grubbers, power grabbers, pussy snatchers.

Sounds like Dr. Seuss but they're real, and in charge. Reaking havoc. Causing pain. Stoking fear.

I saw on the news the first child recovered from the Texas floods was laid to rest today. 

Her parents held each other as they spoke at the podium.

I don't know their names. I blocked them out. But he had his hand on his wife's shoulder as he said,

"I'll miss the hugs and the Father-Daughter dances."